Chapter VIII (part 3 of 6)

“She continued in this sweet frame for more than two hours before she was able to get home. I am very sensible that there may be great joys, arising even to an ecstasy, where there is still no substantial evidence of their being well grounded. But in the present case there seemed to be no evidence wanting in order to prove this joy to be divine; either in regard to its preparatives, attendants, or consequents.

“Of all the persons whom I have seen under spiritual exercise I scarcely ever saw one appear more bowed and broken under convictions of sin and misery, or what is usually called a preparatory work, than this woman; nor scarcely any who seemed to have a greater acquaintance with their own heart than she had. She would frequently complain to me of the hardness and rebellion of her heart. Would tell me that her heart rose and quarrelled with God, when she thought he would do with her as he pleased, and send her to hell, notwithstanding her prayers, good frames, &c., and that her heart was not willing to come to Christ for Salvation, but tried every where else for help. As she seemed to be remarkably sensible of her stubbornness and contrariety to God, under conviction, so she appeared to be no less remarkably bowed and reconciled to his sovereignty, before she obtained any relief or comfort; something of which I have noticed in my journal of Feb. 9. Since that time she has seemed constantly to breathe the temper and spirit of the new creature; crying after Christ, not through fear of hell as before, but with strong desires after him as her only satisfying portion; and has many times wept and sobbed bitterly because, as she apprehended, she did not and could not love him. When I have sometimes asked her why she appeared so sorrowful, and whether it was because she was afraid of hell; she would answer ‘No, I be not distressed about that; but my heart is so wicked I cannot love Christ;’ and thereupon burst into tears. But although this has been the habitual frame of her mind for several weeks together, so that the exercise of grace appeared evident to others; yet she seemed wholly insensible to it herself, and never had any remarkable comfort and sensible satisfaction until this evening.

“This sweet and surprising ecstasy appeared to spring from a true spiritual discovery of the glory, ravishing beauty, and excellency of Christ; and not from any gross imaginary notions of his human nature, such as that of seeing him in such a place, or posture, as hanging on the cross, as bleeding and dying, as gently smiling, and the like; which delusions some have been carried away with. Nor did it rise from sordid selfish apprehensions of her having any benefit whatsoever conferred on her; but from a view of his personal excellency and transcendant loveliness; which drew forth those vehement desires of enjoying him which she now manifested, and made her long ‘to be absent from the body, that she might be present with the Lord.’

“The attendants of this ravishing comfort were such as abundantly discovered its spring to be divine; and that it was truly ‘a joy in the Holy Ghost.’ Now she viewed divine truths as living realities, and could say, ‘I know these things are so; I feel that they are true!’ Now her soul was resigned to the divine will in the most tender point; so that when I said to her, ‘What if God should take away your husband from you, who was then very sick, how do you think you could bear that?’ She replied, ‘He belongs to God, and not to me; he may do with him just as he pleases.’ Now she had the most tender sense of the evil of sin, and discovered the utmost aversion to it, longing to die, that she might be delivered from it. Now she could freely trust her all with God for time and eternity. When I questioned her, ‘How she would be willing to die and leave her little infant; and what she thought would become of it in that case?’ she answered, ‘God will take care of it. It belongs to him. He will take care of it.’ Now she appeared to have the most humbling sense of her own meanness and unworthiness, her weakness and inability to preserve herself from sin, and to persevere in the way of holiness, crying, ‘If I live I shall sin.’ I then thought that I had never seen such an appearance of ecstacy and humility meeting in any one person in all my life before.

“The consequents of this joy are no less desirable and satisfactory than its attendants. She since appears to be a most tender, broken-hearted, affectionate, devout, and humble Christian; as exemplary in life and conversation as any person in my congregation. May she still ‘grow in grace and in the knowledge of Christ.’

March 10. “Toward night the Indians met together, of their own accord, and sang, prayed, and discoursed of divine things among themselves; at which time there was much affection among them. Some, who are hopefully pious, appeared to be melted with divine things; and some others seemed much concerned for their souls. Perceiving their engagement and affection in religious exercises, I went among them, and prayed, and gave a word of exhortation; and observed two or three somewhat affected and concerned, who scarce ever appeared to be under any religious impressions before. It seemed to be a day and evening of divine power. Numbers retained the warm impressions of divine things which had been made upon their minds the day before.

March 14.—“Was visited by a considerable number of my people, and spent some time in religious exercises with them.

March 15. “In the evening catechised. My people answered the questions put to them with surprising readiness and judgment. There appeared some warmth, and a feeling sense of divine things among those who I have reason to hope are real Christians, while I was discoursing upon peace of conscience and joy in the Holy Ghost. These seemed quickened and enlivened in divine service, though there was not so much appearance of concern among those whom I have reason to think in a Christless state.

Lord’s day, March 16.—“Preached to my congregation from Hebrews, 2:1-3. Divine truth seemed to have some considerable influence upon some of the hearers, and produced many tears, as well as heavy sighs and sobs, among those who have given evidence of being real Christians, and others also. The impressions made upon the audience appeared in general deep and heart-affecting; not superficial, noisy and affected.

“Toward night discoursed again on the Great Salvation. The word was again attended with some power upon the audience. Numbers wept affectionately, and to appearance unfeignedly; so that the Spirit of God seemed to be moving upon the face of the assembly. The woman mentioned in my journal of last Lord’s day made a profession of her faith, and appeared to be in a devout, humble, and excellent frame of mind.

“My house being thronged with my people in the evening; I spent the time in religious exercises with them until my nature was almost spent. They are so unwearied in religious exercises, and insatiable in their thirsting after Christian knowledge, that I can sometimes scarcely avoid laboring so as greatly to exhaust my strength and spirits.

March 19.—“Several of the persons who went with me to the Forks of Delaware in February last, having been detained there by the dangerous illness of one of their company, returned home but this day. Whereupon my people generally met together of their own accord, in order to spend some time in religious exercises; and especially to give thanks to God for his preserving goodness to those who had been absent from them for several weeks, and recovering mercy to him who had been sick; and that he had now returned them all in safety. As I was then absent; they desired my school-master to assist them in carrying on their religious solemnity; who tells me that they appeared engaged and affectionate in repeated prayer, singing, &c.

March 22.—“Catechised in my usual method in the evening. My people answered questions to my great satisfaction. There appeared nothing very remarkable in the assembly, considering what has been common among us. Although I may justly say the strict attention, the tenderness and affection, the many tears and heart-affecting sobs, appearing in numbers in the assembly, would have been very remarkable, were it not that God has made these things common among us, and even with strangers soon after their coming among us, from time to time. I am far from thinking that every appearance and particular instance of affection that has been among us, has been truly genuine, and purely from a divine influence. I am sensible of the contrary; and doubt not but there has been some corrupt mixture, some chaff as well as wheat; especially since religious concern has become so common and prevalent here.

Lord’s day, March 23.—“There being about fifteen strangers, adult persons, come among us in the week past, several of whom had never been in any religious meeting till now; I thought it proper to discourse this day in a manner peculiarly suited to their circumstances and capacities; and accordingly attempted it from Hosea, 13:9. ‘O Israel, thou hast destroyed thyself.’ In the forenoon I opened, in the plainest manner I could, man’s apostacy and ruined state, after having spoken some things respecting the being and perfections of God, and his creation of man in a state of uprightness and happiness. In the afternoon endeavored to open the glorious provision God has made for the redemption of apostate creatures, by giving his own dear Son to suffer for them and satisfy divine justice on their behalf. There was not that affection and concern in the assembly which has been common among us; although there was a desirable attention appearing in general, and even in most of the strangers.

“Near sun-set I felt an uncommon concern upon my mind, especially for the poor strangers; that God had so much withheld his presence and the powerful influence of his Spirit from the assembly in the exercises of the day; and thereby withheld from them that degree of conviction which I hoped they might have had. In this frame I visited several houses, and discoursed with some concern and affection to several persons particularly; but without much appearance of success till I came to a house where several of the strangers were. There the solemn truths on which I discoursed appeared to take effect; first upon some children; then upon several adult persons who had been somewhat awakened before; and afterward upon several of the Pagan strangers.

“I continued my discourse, with some fervency, until almost every one in the house was melted into tears, and many wept aloud, and appeared earnestly concerned to obtain an interest in Christ. Upon this, numbers soon gathered from all the houses round about; and so thronged the place that we were obliged to remove to the house where we usually met for public worship. The congregation gathered immediately, and many appearing remarkably affected, I discoursed some time from Luke, 19:10; endeavoring to open the mercy, compassion, and concern of Christ for lost, helpless, and undone sinners. There was much visible concern and affection in the assembly; and I doubt not but that a divine influence accompanied what was spoken to the hearts of many. There were five or six of the strangers, men and women, who appeared to be considerably awakened; and, in particular, one very rugged young man, who seemed as if nothing would move him, was now brought to tremble like the jailor, and weep for a long time.

“The Pagans who were awakened, seemed at once to put off their savage roughness and Pagan manners, and became sociable, orderly and humane in their carriage. When they first came, I exhorted my religious people to take pains with them as they had done with other strangers from time to time, to instruct them in Christianity. But when some of them attempted something of that nature, the strangers would soon rise up and walk to other houses in order to avoid the hearing of such discourses. Whereupon some of the serious persons agreed to disperse themselves into the several parts of the settlement; so that wherever the strangers went, they met with some instructive discourse, and warm addresses respecting their salvation. But now there was no need of using policy, in order to get an opportunity of conversing with some of them about their spiritual concerns; for they were so far touched with a sense of their perishing state, as made them voluntarily yield to the closest addresses which were made them, respecting their sin and misery, their need of an acquaintance with, and interest in the great Redeemer.

March 24.—“Numbered the Indians to see how many souls God had gathered together here since my coming into these parts; and found there were now about an hundred and thirty persons together, old and young. Several of those, who are my stated hearers, perhaps to the number of fifteen or twenty, were absent at this season. If all had been together the number would now have been very considerable; especially considering how few were together at my first coming into this part of the country: the whole number not amounting to ten persons at that time.

“My people went out this day with the design of clearing some of their land, above fifteen miles distant from this settlement, in order to their settling there in a compact form, where they might be under the advantages of attending the public worship of God, of having their children taught in a school, and at the same time have a conveniency for planting: their land, in the place of our present residence, being of little or no value for that purpose. The design of their settling thus in a body, and cultivating their lands, of which they have done very little in their Pagan state, being of such necessity and importance to their religious interest as well as worldly comfort; I thought it proper to call them together, and show them the duty of laboring with faithfulness and industry, and that they must not now ‘be slothful in business,’ as they had ever been in their Pagan state. I endeavored to press the importance of their being laborious, diligent, and vigorous in the prosecution of their business; especially at the present juncture, the season of planting being now near, in order to their being in a capacity of living together, and enjoying the means of grace and instruction. Having given them directions for their work, which they very much wanted, as well as for their behavior in divers respects; I explained, sang, and endeavored to inculcate upon them Dr. Watts’ Psalm,

If God to build the house deny &c.

and having recommended them, and the design of their going forth, to God, by prayer with them, I dismissed them to their business.

“In the evening read and expounded to those of my people who were yet at home, and to the strangers newly come, the substance of the 3d chapter of the Acts. Numbers seemed to melt under the word; especially while I was discoursing upon verse 19. ‘Repent ye, therefore, and be converted,’ &c. Several of the strangers also were affected. When I asked them afterward, whether they did not now feel that their hearts were wicked, as I had taught them; one of them replied, ‘Yes, she felt it now.’ Although before she came here, upon hearing that I taught the Indians that their hearts were all bad by nature, and needed to be changed and made good by the power of God; she had said, ‘Her heart was not wicked, and she had never done any thing that was bad in her life.’ This, indeed, seems to be the case with them, I think universally, in their pagan state. They seem to have no consciousness of sin and guilt, unless they can charge themselves with some gross acts of sin contrary to the commands of the second table.

March 27.—“Discoursed to a number of my people in one of their houses in a more private manner. Inquired particularly into their spiritual states, in order to see what impressions they were under. Laid before them the marks of a regenerate, as well as of an unregenerate state; and endeavored to suit and direct my discourse to them severally, according as I apprehended their states to be. There were a considerable number gathered together before I finished my discourse; and several seemed much affected while I was urging the necessity and infinite importance of getting into a renewed state. I find particular and close dealing with souls in private is often very successful.

March 29.—“In the evening catechised, as usual upon Saturday. Treated upon the benefits which believers receive from Christ at death. The questions were answered with great readiness and propriety; and those who I have reason to think are the dear people of God were in general sweetly melted. There appeared such a liveliness and vigor in their attendance upon the word of God, and such eagerness to be made partakers of the benefits mentioned, that they seemed not only to be ‘looking for,’ but ‘hasting to, the coming of the day of God.’ Divine truths seemed to distil upon the audience with a gentle but melting efficacy, as the refreshing ‘showers upon the new mown grass.’ The assembly in general, as well as those who appear truly religious, were affected with some brief accounts of the blessedness of the godly at death; and most of them then discovered an affectionate inclination to cry ‘Let me die the death of the righteous, and let my last end be like his;’ although many were not duly engaged to obtain the change of heart that is necessary to that blessed end.

Lord’s day, March 30.—“Discoursed from Matt. 25:31-40. There was a very considerable moving, and affectionate melting, in the assembly. I hope that there were some real, deep, and abiding impressions of divine things made upon the minds of many. There was one aged man, newly come among us, who appeared to be considerably awakened that never was touched with any concern for his soul before. In the evening catechised. There was not that tenderness and melting engagement among God’s people which appeared the evening before, and many other times. They answered the questions distinctly, and well, and were devout and attentive in divine service.

March 31.—“Called my people together, as I had done the Monday evening before, and discoursed to them again on the necessity and importance of laboring industriously in order to their living together, and enjoying the means of grace, &c. Having engaged in a solemn prayer to God among them for a blessing upon their attempts, I dismissed them to their work. Numbers of them, both men and women, seemed to offer themselves willingly to this service; and some appeared affectionately concerned that God might go with them, and begin their little town for them; that by his blessing it might be a place comfortable for them and theirs, with regard both to procuring the necessaries of life and to attending on the worship of God.

April 5.—“Catechised in the evening. There appeared to be some affection and fervent engagement in divine service through the assembly in general; especially toward the conclusion of my discourse. After public worship a number of those who I have reason to think are truly religious came to my house, and seemed eager for some farther entertainment upon divine things. While I was conversing with them about their scriptural exercises; observing to them, that God’s work in the hearts of all his children was, for substance the same; and that their trials and temptations were also alike; and showing the obligations such were under to love one another in a peculiar manner, they seemed to be melted into tenderness and affection toward each other. I thought that this particular token of their being the disciples of Christ, viz. of their having love one toward another, had scarcely ever appeared more evident than at this time.

Lord’s day, April 6.—“Preached from Matt. 7:21-23. There were considerable effects of the word visible in the audience, and such as were very desirable; an earnest attention, a great solemnity, many tears and heavy sighs, which were modestly suppressed in a considerable measure, and appeared unaffected and without any indecent commotion of the passions. Numbers of the religious people were put upon serious and close examination of their spiritual state by hearing that ‘not every one that saith to Christ, Lord, Lord, shall enter into his kingdom.’ Some expressed fears lest they had deceived themselves, and taken up a false hope, because they found they had done so little of the will of his Father who is in heaven.

“There was one man brought under a very great and pressing concern for his soul; which appeared more especially after his retirement from public worship. That which he says gave him his great uneasiness was, not so much any particular sin, as that he had never done the will of God at all, but had sinned continually, and so had no claim to the kingdom of heaven. In the afternoon I opened to them the discipline of Christ in his Church, and the method in which offenders are to be dealt with; at which time the religious people were much affected; especially when they heard that the offender, continuing obstinate, must finally be esteemed and treated ‘as an heathen man,’ as a pagan, who has no part nor lot among God’s visible people. Of this they seemed to have the most awful apprehensions; a state of heathenism, out of which they were so lately brought, appearing very dreadful to them.

“After public worship I visited several houses to see how they spent the remainder of the Sabbath, and to treat with them solemnly on the great concerns of their souls. The Lord seemed to smile upon my private endeavors, and to make these particular and personal addresses more effectual upon some than my public discourses.

April 7.—“Discoursed to my people in the evening, from 1 Cor. 11:23-26. Endeavored to open to them the institution, nature, and ends of the Lord’s Supper, as well as of the qualifications and preparations necessary to the right participation of that ordinance. Numbers appeared much affected with the love of Christ, manifested in his making this provision for the comfort of his people, at a season when himself was just entering upon his sharpest sufferings.

Lord’s day, April 20.—“Discoursed, both forenoon and afternoon, from Luke, 24; explaining most of the chapter, and making remarks upon it. There was a desirable attention in the audience; though there was not so much appearance of affection and tenderness among them as had been usual. Our meeting was very full; there being sundry strangers present who had never been with us before.

“In the evening catechised. My people answered the questions proposed to them readily and distinctly; and I could perceive that they advanced in their knowledge of the principles of Christianity. There appeared an affectionate melting in the assembly at this time. Several, who I trust are truly religious, were refreshed and quickened, and seemed by their discourse and behavior after public worship to have their ‘hearts knit together in love.’ This was a sweet and blessed season, like many others with which my poor people have been favored in months past. God has caused this little fleece to be repeatedly wet with the blessed dew of his divine grace, while all the earth around has been comparatively dry.

April 25.—“Set apart this day, as preparatory to the administration of the Lord’s Supper, for solemn fasting and prayer. The design was to implore the blessing of God upon our renewing covenant with him, and with one another, to walk together in the fear of God, in love and Christian fellowship, and to entreat that his presence might be with us in our designed approach to his table; as well as to humble ourselves before God on account of the apparent withdrawment, at least in a measure, of that blessed influence which has been so prevalent upon persons of all ages among us; as also on account of the rising appearance of carelessness, vanity, and vice, among some who once appeared to be touched and affected with divine truth, and brought to some sensibility of their miserable and perishing state by nature. It was also designed that we might importunately pray for the peaceable settlement of the Indians together in a body; that they might be a commodious congregation for the worship of God; and that God would defeat all the attempts that were, or might be, made against that pious design.[G]

Footnote G:

There was at this time a terrible clamor raised against the Indians in various places in the country, and insinuations as though I was training them up to cut people’s throats. Numbers wished to have them banished from these parts, and some gave out great words in order to fright and deter them from settling upon the best and most convenient tract of their own lands; threatening to trouble them in the law; pretending a claim to these lands themselves, although never purchased of the Indians.

“The solemnity was observed and seriously attended, not only by those who proposed to commune at the Lord’s table, but by the whole congregation. In the former part of the day I endeavored to open to my people the nature and design of a fast, as I had attempted more briefly to do before, and to instruct them in the duties of such a solemnity. In the afternoon I insisted on the special reasons there were for our engaging in these solemn exercises at this time; both in regard to the need we stood in of divine assistance, in order to a due preparation for that sacred ordinance, upon which some of us were proposing, with leave of divine Providence, speedily to attend; and also in respect of the manifest decline of God’s work here, as to the effectual conviction and conversion of sinners; there having been few of late deeply awakened out of a state of security. The worship of God was attended with great solemnity and reverence, with much tenderness and many tears, by those who appeared to be truly religious; and there was some appearance of divine power upon those who had been awakened some time before, and who were still under concern.

“After repeated prayer, and attendance upon the word of God, I proposed to the religious people, with as much brevity and plainness as I could, the substance of the doctrine of the christian faith, as I had formerly done; and had their renewed cheerful assent to it. I then led them to a solemn renewal of their covenant, wherein they had explicitly and publicly given up themselves to God the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost, avouching him to be their God; and at the same time renouncing their heathenish vanities, their idolatrous and superstitious practices; solemnly engaging to take the Word of God, so far as it was or might be made known to them, for the rule of their lives; promising to walk together in love, to watch over themselves and one another, to lead lives of seriousness and devotion, and to discharge the relative duties incumbent on them respectively, &c. This solemn transaction was attended with much gravity and seriousness; and at the same time with the utmost readiness, freedom and cheerfulness; and a religious union and harmony of soul seemed to crown the whole solemnity. I could not but think in the evening, that there had been manifest tokens of the divine presence with us in all the several services of the day; though it was also manifest that there was not that concern among Christless souls which has often appeared here.

April 26.—“Toward noon prayed with a dying child, and gave a word of exhortation to the bystanders to prepare for death; which seemed to take effect upon some. In the afternoon discoursed to my people from Matthew, 26:26-30; of the author, the nature, and designs of the Lord’s supper; and endeavored to point out the worthy receivers of that ordinance. The religious people were affected, and even melted with divine truth,—with a view of the dying love of Christ. Several others, who had been for some months under convictions of their perishing state, appeared now to be much moved with concern, and afresh engaged in seeking after an interest in Christ; although I cannot say that the word of God appeared so quick and powerful, so sharp and piercing to the assembly, as it had sometimes formerly done.